Staying Home: What It Really Looks Like
Staying home is the option that most families think is the right call first. The house is the de facto “home base” for the whole family. Because of this, almost all families that I have helped initially think this is the only option.
I personally tried to make this option work…
My wife and I tried to keep her father in his house. We did some minor modifications and got the bathroom more accessible. We also got someone to come in to help with medicines and cleaning.
Although it didn’t work, it was not for lack of effort.
Quick Answer
Staying home works best when care needs are manageable, the home can be safely modified, and there is consistent support from family or caregivers.
What Life Looks Like
If the right choice is to keep your mom or dad at home with slight modifications, life will be a little different. The most glaring things that will change is
What are your options
Care: The entire support system (family, friends, and other caregivers) work to maintain their health and safety
Home Modifications: The house has things like grab bars, ramps, and other attainable modifications to help keep your mom or dad safe as they age.
Home Health Care: Hiring companies who specialize in caring for your mom or dad in the home is, often, the right move.
Less “Stuff”: The house should be gone through to make it the right size for them, meaning there should be less to clean and use, but also to minimize tripping hazards.
Lifestyle: Your mom and dad will have different needs and, in turn, a different lifestyle with (what I call) monitored independence.
Monitored independence is allowing your mom or dad to still do a lot on their own, but you or someone else is present for all doctor appointments as a “second set of ears” to hear all the details.
Who This Works Best For… and When It Doesn’t Anymore
Every family has different needs, hopes, and goals for their family and the house. If it is the right decision, there needs to be…
Strong support system
Stable memory + mobility
This is sustainable until it’s not - that may include…
Be sure you and your mom or dad are making the right decisions and
Safety declines in the home
More constant care is required for them.
or if’d rather talk it out