How to Talk to Your Parents About Moving
You probably know more about senior housing, aging, and memory related illnesses than you thought you ever would. One thing that isn’t ever covered in that research, or even in the checklists you find everywhere
That’s because
This Is One of the Hardest Conversations
There’s no perfect script because every family and situation is different.
There is a better approach to having this conversation…
In my experience, here is….
What Doesn’t Work
Forcing the conversation it’s a hard conversation and making them have it will almost assuredly put them on the defensive.
Using logic alone is great in the decision process, but you have to realize that they will not see logic or, sometimes, even understand it.
Waiting until a crisis puts you behind the 8-ball because you’re forced to make a decision it’s hard to make the right decision when you’re making a rushed decisions.
What Helps Instead
Start early to allow them time to “buy in” to the idea and see a variety of communities and so you can make sure it’s right
Ask questions instead of telling let’s your mom or dad think they have more control over the conversation. You may even bring in a neutral third party to help.
Focus on safety and quality of life to appeal to the them and make them realize that not everything they think they know is correct about Senior Communities.
Or we can
Start with Curiosity, Not Control
You and everyone involved are a team. The most important member of that team, your mom or dad, doesn’t know yet they’re on the team. The best way to get them on board is to make them realize it on their own
Ask questions about their feelings
Show them the benefits, both immediate and long-term
Allow them to lead the conversation at times
Try this
Instead of “We need to talk about moving.” Try something like “How have things been feeling at home lately?”
2. Focus on What Matters to Them
You don’t want to focus on the prices, the amenities, or even their current house. Instead, steer the conversation to things like:
independence
safety
comfort
routine
3. Keep It Ongoing
This is not a one-time conversation. There will be different conversations with varying levels of frustration, disagreements, confusion, and happiness.
It’s a series of conversations over a long time - sometimes even after they’re in the right sized home
Learn more about When Safety Becomes a Concern
Explore your Options in Denver
Keep your mind open to changes and it will rub off on their mind